After listening to a radio broadcast, I thought I'd extend these three main emotional needs to my followers. I believe in positive parenting ("yes you may hit the ball, let's go outside instead") but, BUT there is a defined line you can't cross.
I want to help you understand the three values before I get into greater detail. Boundaries: set expectations, limits, and goals that are clearly set in stone for your child. It's vital that these are never swayed, pushed aside, or written off entirely. The best way to do this is to create a family plan early on. Go over what you expect a walk in a parking lot to look like, for example. Cause and effect (if you dint hold my hand or the cart, you could get hit by a car. That would hurt and make mommy sad.)
Love: I on very rare occasions will tell my child I'm sad at him. I will never, ever say I don't love him. He needs to know through failures and success that I am a solid rock of support for him. We hug, snuggle, and give kisses. Showing your child you love him even through frustration sets him up for such success in the real world!
Time: I never (ok sometimes) expect immediate results. He needs time to reach goals, learn new things, and to become a good person. It's huge not to let what's happening today effect the big picture. They are your most important investment! Give THEM your time. Laundry can wait! Your child is only this age for today!
Ok. Depth time. I struggle when I see parents who do not follow through. Parents who are so rushed there children are crying out for love and time and it's ignored. I can almost see there little hearts melting and hardening against their parents. How are they shaping these kids? It makes me flash back to those kids in school, the bullies. The rich kids with 90 hour week patents, and no respect for anything. Sure, they might be CEOs one day of higher up companies and working as much as there parents, but what gifts are they giving to society? What kids will they raise.
I might be bias here. I could be completely wrong, but I believe who you are defines you more than what you do. I'm raising my children to be loving, considerate, attentive, respectful adults who are genuine. I want them to be independent, righteous as humanly possible, and worldly. I want then to value life more than material, and to seek out opportunities that will benefit them. These may not be your goals. That's fine! But, this is the way to reach you Childs inner soul. Parent there hearts, not there minds!
Friday, March 23, 2012
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Microscope
This is a growing blog entry. Will update with activities/photos as the product progresses.
We purchased an eduscience microscope set at toys r us for A. We showed him the basic opperations, how to view, and how to prepare slides.
We purchased an eduscience microscope set at toys r us for A. We showed him the basic opperations, how to view, and how to prepare slides.
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Raising Good Decision Makers
The bible study I'm taking this semester is called the case for kids. I'll be referencing this continuously. I really felt a need to touch on this subject that was mentioned.
How often do you see a 12 year old girl wearing inappropriate clothing, a toddler eating unhealthy foods, or a small child snatching toys from others with no remorse??? I've witnessed this countless times, and many parent are convinced they are exploring their individuality, learning to make there own choices, ext.
What does this look like in our grown up world??? Have you been to a fast food restaurant and witnessed an employee slowly walking around, pants that don't fit, tattoos everywhere, gum smacking, hair all a mess??? What's your first thought when ordering food from that restaurant? I don't know about you, but I instantly think the company doesn't care about it's appearance, therefor the food is probably not well made, and I do not want to invest my money into that company. Same goes for rude employees, dirty locations, the list goes on. Now, what do you think the CEO of these places looks and acts like???
What kind of CEO are you? Do you want others to want to invest in your children??? Do you want them to be good citizens, friends, religious followers??? My kids are sometimes allowed to chose what they want. But, they will always listen to what we want for them. A will play sports through school, not a choice. He will learn an instrument. He will eat healthy foods. He will be kind, have manners, respect his elders, wear pants, and obey us. He's not going to be an 18 year old with no individuality. He will not wonder if he likes green or blue. He will know what he wants to do on Friday nights.
What I'm getting at is it's never helpful to a child to give in to their wants. All it teaches them is that they are in control, and that you will give in to their wants. (I was a child like this, yes, this is what kids feel) What is helpful is making model decisions, giving them good choices to follow, and setting firm roots for them to build on.
How often do you see a 12 year old girl wearing inappropriate clothing, a toddler eating unhealthy foods, or a small child snatching toys from others with no remorse??? I've witnessed this countless times, and many parent are convinced they are exploring their individuality, learning to make there own choices, ext.
What does this look like in our grown up world??? Have you been to a fast food restaurant and witnessed an employee slowly walking around, pants that don't fit, tattoos everywhere, gum smacking, hair all a mess??? What's your first thought when ordering food from that restaurant? I don't know about you, but I instantly think the company doesn't care about it's appearance, therefor the food is probably not well made, and I do not want to invest my money into that company. Same goes for rude employees, dirty locations, the list goes on. Now, what do you think the CEO of these places looks and acts like???
What kind of CEO are you? Do you want others to want to invest in your children??? Do you want them to be good citizens, friends, religious followers??? My kids are sometimes allowed to chose what they want. But, they will always listen to what we want for them. A will play sports through school, not a choice. He will learn an instrument. He will eat healthy foods. He will be kind, have manners, respect his elders, wear pants, and obey us. He's not going to be an 18 year old with no individuality. He will not wonder if he likes green or blue. He will know what he wants to do on Friday nights.
What I'm getting at is it's never helpful to a child to give in to their wants. All it teaches them is that they are in control, and that you will give in to their wants. (I was a child like this, yes, this is what kids feel) What is helpful is making model decisions, giving them good choices to follow, and setting firm roots for them to build on.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Daily awakenings: how to create a responsive child through play
Day 1: observations
I'd like for you to close your eyes and imagine a penny. Describe it on a piece of paper to the best of your knowledge. Now, get your purse and pull one out. Show it to your child. Let them explore it and make notes. What did you learn??? What did they learn??
It's incredibly important to remember what kids see, and what you see are different, but similar. Make connections by observing how your child learns. Touch, sight, taste, smell, sounds are all APPROPRIATE ways for them to learn!
Day 2: making connections
Take what you learnt from day 1, and continue the penny learning. Use the following as a guide, implement what you feel is appropriate.
Did your child :
Feel the penny? Rub it against their cheek, against you? Did they trace the picture? Touch each letter?
***** bring crayons and paper out. Show them how to trace the penny, make a rubbing. Fill a sensory bin with penny's and rice. Give them baggies and a jar of penny's. Give them a sensory bin with water and pennies (see where I'm going with this???)
If they banged the penny into something, dropped it, tossed it-
*******Give them a jar of pennies with a lid to shake, let them drop pennies into water, give them lots of random objects to tap the penny onto.
If they smelt/tasted the penny(some kids will!!)
Give them spoons of differing materials, let them wash the pennies before licking
If they looked (and I mean LOOKEd) at the penny
*** give them president books and pennies, give them flash cards to match letters, rubbings would be fun, show them how to drop water onto the pennies until the bubble breaks, clean the pennies
If your child asks questions about the penny:
**** show them the symbols, describe them, set up a counting station with numbered markers (plates, paper, egg cartons) to count the pennies into
Day 3: child led
Revisit any area that may pop up, as your Childs interest grows. Allow them to use the pennies in any way during play. Answer questions, help stack, and most importantly encourage them to explore!!
Day4-9999999999999999999
Watch as your child gains knowledge, makes real life connections, and gains independence :)
Repeat with any and all objects, create new activities based on your Childs interest, and enjoy ;)
I'd like for you to close your eyes and imagine a penny. Describe it on a piece of paper to the best of your knowledge. Now, get your purse and pull one out. Show it to your child. Let them explore it and make notes. What did you learn??? What did they learn??
It's incredibly important to remember what kids see, and what you see are different, but similar. Make connections by observing how your child learns. Touch, sight, taste, smell, sounds are all APPROPRIATE ways for them to learn!
Day 2: making connections
Take what you learnt from day 1, and continue the penny learning. Use the following as a guide, implement what you feel is appropriate.
Did your child :
Feel the penny? Rub it against their cheek, against you? Did they trace the picture? Touch each letter?
***** bring crayons and paper out. Show them how to trace the penny, make a rubbing. Fill a sensory bin with penny's and rice. Give them baggies and a jar of penny's. Give them a sensory bin with water and pennies (see where I'm going with this???)
If they banged the penny into something, dropped it, tossed it-
*******Give them a jar of pennies with a lid to shake, let them drop pennies into water, give them lots of random objects to tap the penny onto.
If they smelt/tasted the penny(some kids will!!)
Give them spoons of differing materials, let them wash the pennies before licking
If they looked (and I mean LOOKEd) at the penny
*** give them president books and pennies, give them flash cards to match letters, rubbings would be fun, show them how to drop water onto the pennies until the bubble breaks, clean the pennies
If your child asks questions about the penny:
**** show them the symbols, describe them, set up a counting station with numbered markers (plates, paper, egg cartons) to count the pennies into
Day 3: child led
Revisit any area that may pop up, as your Childs interest grows. Allow them to use the pennies in any way during play. Answer questions, help stack, and most importantly encourage them to explore!!
Day4-9999999999999999999
Watch as your child gains knowledge, makes real life connections, and gains independence :)
Repeat with any and all objects, create new activities based on your Childs interest, and enjoy ;)
Sunday, January 29, 2012
"like Chinese bamboo"
I was reading the first bit of the seven habits of highly effective families, when a comparison caught my eye. I'd like to reinvent this for you.
When you begin to raise your child from the first breath they take your planting that seed. Your watering it (over, under, just enough) weeding it(or not), and giving it light (or clouds). Every choice you make is impacting where that plant will grow, how big, strong, how resilient it is to change and extreme conditions, and how much it effects it's world around it (giving shade, food)
If you think back to your childhood, do you remember a tree or plant that made an impact??? A favorite hiding spot, the best smell??? Well, I want that for my child. I want my kids to touch others and make a lasting great impression on this world.
This brings me to the Chinese bamboo. It grows for four years underground. No one sees anything but a small sprout, but there are great works. It's burrowing under the earth creating it's foundation, and it's creating it's own barrier against other plants (morals). Then, on the fifth year that sprout shoots up 80 feet. In one year it gives enough bamboo to build a small water system, or a side of a home. It does great things!
Kids are like Chinese bamboo. Don't expect them to be amazing right away. It takes time to have a disciplined home, and a self disciplined child. I can promise you that that fifth year will come, if you nurture your Childs needs, give them every chance to grow and learn, and give them consistency.
:)
When you begin to raise your child from the first breath they take your planting that seed. Your watering it (over, under, just enough) weeding it(or not), and giving it light (or clouds). Every choice you make is impacting where that plant will grow, how big, strong, how resilient it is to change and extreme conditions, and how much it effects it's world around it (giving shade, food)
If you think back to your childhood, do you remember a tree or plant that made an impact??? A favorite hiding spot, the best smell??? Well, I want that for my child. I want my kids to touch others and make a lasting great impression on this world.
This brings me to the Chinese bamboo. It grows for four years underground. No one sees anything but a small sprout, but there are great works. It's burrowing under the earth creating it's foundation, and it's creating it's own barrier against other plants (morals). Then, on the fifth year that sprout shoots up 80 feet. In one year it gives enough bamboo to build a small water system, or a side of a home. It does great things!
Kids are like Chinese bamboo. Don't expect them to be amazing right away. It takes time to have a disciplined home, and a self disciplined child. I can promise you that that fifth year will come, if you nurture your Childs needs, give them every chance to grow and learn, and give them consistency.
:)
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Let me help!
This has been a HUGE challenge. A always wants to help, and i've been too scared on some things to let him. Well, that's hit a 180 this year. A has his very own rolling pin, and bagel knife for cutting. There's a stool he can always use wherever needed, and I've let him take on more responsibility. He cleans his room, his playroom, and his bathroom. He brings down his sheets if there's an accident, and pushes the buttons on the washer. He vacuums, washes windows, puts his plates away, sets the table, has gotten dressed on his own since 2, brushes his teeth, bathes himself, cleans his art brushes, and feeds the dogs. Keep in mind he's 4. Today, he asked to help clean the floors. The mop was too big, and I knew right away a bowl filled with soap water and two dogs was not going to fly, so I gave him a watering can filled with floor cleaner and water, and a scrubby brush. He LOVED this. Cleaned the entire downstairs (thinking of making this a Monday morning activity every week, and changing the " tool", maybe add a spray bottle? Hmm. Here's our photos :) 
Buildable meal
Whats more fun than playing with your food?!? Getting to make it, too! This was a hit. All you need hotdogs, spaghetti noodles, and boiling water. We added tomato sauce for dipping, but you can use whatever you'd like! (I also used turkey kelbasa since I'm not a big fan of dogs.;))
Have the child use a bagel knife, or butter knife to cut the hot dogs into large chunks. We broke our noodles in half first, and then a went to town putting them into the hotdog chunks, createing towers and robots. Add finished product to boiling water, cook 10 minutes, remove and cool, add sauce, serve :) a said there are fishy friends in my tummy after two huge helpings :)
Have the child use a bagel knife, or butter knife to cut the hot dogs into large chunks. We broke our noodles in half first, and then a went to town putting them into the hotdog chunks, createing towers and robots. Add finished product to boiling water, cook 10 minutes, remove and cool, add sauce, serve :) a said there are fishy friends in my tummy after two huge helpings :)
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